POKEMON FEATURE - January 2000
| Cock-fighting. Illegal dogfighting. Bear-baiting. Things
which appeal to the blood-loving Neanderthal thug that lives deep down inside all of us,
but things you’d have to be a pretty big wanker to actually get involved in for real.
It’s lucky, then, that some kind software publisher has invented a game that gives
you all the excitement of cockfighting without all the moral unpleasantness. But
who’d have thought it would be cuddly old kiddie-friendly Nintendo? Because what no-one seems to have noticed as the phenomenon has taken hold of Britain like it did everywhere else in the world, is that blockbusting, millions-selling Game Boy game Pokemon is, in fact, nothing more than a cockfighting simulator. Think about it – you take some wild animals, train them for attack and equip them with "weaponry", and then set them on other wild animals trained by your competitors in a brutal fight to the death. (A couple of the Pokemon characters even look like chickens, which is a bit of a giveaway.) And then the winner gets a load of money. Even the cutest of graphics can’t disguise what’s really going on here. So the next time you feel that primitive bloodlust rising within you, don’t go out and have a fight in a car park – just whip out your Game Boy and watch a load of vicious little creatures tear each other to bits for half an hour. And if anyone sees you, just tell them you’re getting in touch with your inner child by playing a harmless little video game. Isn’t that sweet? |
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