STU'S AWESOME WORLD OF CORRECT POP LYRICS


Along with videogame cheat sites, pop lyric sites are the curse of the web. There are millions of them, yet they're all totally shit - and more relevantly, they're identically totally shit. There seems to be one half-deaf Hungarian old man with a heavy cold in a railway arch somewhere underneath a busy motorway whose job it is to listen, once, through a badly-tuned-in AM radio with failing batteries, to every new pop song and scribble down a vague, nonsensical approximation of the lyrics, which is then instantly beamed to every lyric site in the universe and printed verbatim without further human interference.

It's hard to think of another reason why websites which appear to exist solely to convey the lyrics of pop songs could ALL get them completely, senselessly wrong (it doesn't seem to matter to either the half-deaf old man or the website editors if the lyrics are total gibberish), and all get them wrong identically, down to the last misplaced punctuation mark. Why bother listening to the songs at all? If you're going to print the wrong lyrics, why not just make them up? It'd at least be funny.

Lyric sites exist solely in order to attack people's computers with an avalanche of terrible pop-up ads, desperately trying to sell them shit they don't want. Of course, that's true about most of the internet, but doing it by corrupting and trampling all over things of sometimes extraordinary excellence or beauty is a vile crime. Most pop is crap, so it doesn't matter so much. But a few songs deserve much, much better than to be treated so shabbily. And that's why we're here.
 

No.1 - Kelly Osbourne, "Shut Up"

No.2 - Natasha Bedingfield, "These Words"

No.3 - 60ft Dolls, "Hair"

No.4 - Teenage Fanclub, "The Count"

No.5 - Annie, "Chewing Gum"

 

 

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